Tina Fey and Amy Poehler hosted the 71st annual Golden Globes last night and, because of the duo’s irreverence, easy playfulness and self-deprecation, the award show was a success! We have compiled a list of 15 of the best quotes of the evening, from the hosts themselves, the presenters and, of course, the winners! Enjoy!
15. Matthew McConaughey, Best Actor in a Drama Acceptance Speech
“[‘Dallas Buyers Club’] was turned down 86 times… I’m so glad it got passed on so many times or it wouldn’t have come to me.”
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14. Spike Jonze, Best Screenplay Acceptance Speech
“I’m a terrible public speaker. And I’m bad at English. And it’s the only language I know.”
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13. Alfonso Cuaron, Best Director Acceptance Speech, to Sandra Bullock
“I want to thank you for not quitting when you thought that I have told you, ‘Sandra, I’m going to give you herpes,’ when what I really meant to say was, ‘Sandra, I’m going to give you an earpiece.'”
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12. Co-host Amy Poehler on a Stellar Year for Films and TV
“Matt [Damon], on any other night, in any other room, you’d be a big deal. Tonight, and don’t take this the wrong way, you’re basically a garbage person.”
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11. Tina Fey on Matthew McConaughey
“For his role in “Dallas Buyers Club,” he lost 40 pounds, or what actresses call being in a movie.”
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10. Tina Fey on Meryl Streep
“Mery Streep, so brilliant in “August: Osage County” – proving that there are still great parts in Hollywood for Meryl Streeps over 60.”
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9. Amy Poehler on the show “Masters of Sex”
“‘Masters of Sex’ is the degree I got from Boston College.”
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8. Jim Carrey Introducing “American Hustle”
“Dying is easy. Comedy is hard. I believe it was Shia LaBeouf who said that. So young, so wise.”
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7. Amy Poehler on “The Wolf of Wall Street”
“If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I’d go to one of Jonah Hill’s pool parties.”
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6. Cate Blanchett’s Acceptance Speech for “Blue Jasmine”
“Thank you for plying me with vodka the way Judy Garland was probably plied with barbiturates.”
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5. Amy Poehler on Woody Allen
“Woody Allen is the recipient of this year’s Cecil B DeMille award, just a few years after Martin Scorsese won it. I assume the award is for the world’s tiniest man with the biggest glasses.”
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4. Tina Fey on “The Wolf of Wall Street”
“The Wolf of Wall Street shocked viewers by using the f-word 506 times in three hours, which is a new record unless you count my dad trying to hang some curtain rods in our living room.”
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3. Tina Fey
“And now, like a supermodel’s vagina, let’s all give a warm welcome to Leonardo DiCaprio.”
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2. Tina Fey on “American Hustle”
“Interesting fact: the original title of that movie was Explosion at the Wig Factory.”
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1. Tina Fey on the movie “Gravity”
“It’s the story of how George Clooney would rather float away in space and die than spend any more time with a woman his own age.”