The 10 Most Obnoxious John Mayer Quotes!

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Back in 2010, John Mayer came under fire for making a number of controversial comments. Although he disappeared for a while and came back a more humble man, it’s hard to forget some of the things he said. Here are 10 of John Mayer’s most obnoxious quotes!

10.

On his ex-girlfriend, Jessica Simpson: “And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them,” he said, adding, “Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me.”

9.

On the number of women he’s been with: “I’m going to say four or five. No more,” he told Playboy. “But even if I said 12, that’s a reasonable number. So is 15. Here’s the thing: I get less a** now than I did when I was in a local band. Because now I don’t like jumping through hoops.”

8.

On his fans: “I have male fans, but I’m persuading them to become female.”

7.

On women: “Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you’re really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I’ve got a few missing. It’s ok though, because I’ve got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem?”

6.

“Sometimes I get so bold and I’m so confident about what I’m doing that I actually try to be more of a dork because it’s a really liberating feeling to experience what it’s like to not care.”

5.

He claims that he doesn’t go after many women because of the scrutiny on his love life: “I should be having sex with more girls. It’s crazy to me that in my head, that being 32 and dating women is going to get me in trouble. I can’t even explain to you how terrible that feels, that I equate dating a woman with punishment, shame, guilt, disappointment, reproach, reprimand, persecution. It’s a nightmare.”

4.

On his feud with Perez Hilton: “I remember seeing Perez Hilton flitting about this club and acting as though he had just invented homosexuality,” he said. “All of a sudden I thought, I can out-gay this guy right now. I grabbed him and gave him the dirtiest, tongue-iest kiss I have ever put on anybody – almost as if I hated f*gs.”

3.

On wooing women: “I want to show her I’m not like every other guy. Because I hate other men. When I’m f**king you, I’m trying to f**k every man who’s ever f**ked you, but in his ass, so you’ll say ‘No one’s ever done that to me in bed.’”

2.

“I come on very strong. I am a very… I’m just very. V-E-R-Y. And if you can’t handle very, then I’m a douche bag. But I think the world needs a little very. That’s why black people love me.”

1.

On his aspirations: “When I watch porn, if it’s not hot enough, I’ll make up backstories in my mind. My biggest dream is to write pornography.”