Gossip Girl: Best Blair Waldorf Quotes

Published on December 14, 2015. Updated October 2, 2019

Cate

Blair Waldorf was easily the most interesting character on Gossip Girl. She was insecure, spoiled, totally entitled and, surprisingly, quite funny and endearing. Leighton Meester made Blair one of those characters that people can relate to and emphasize with, which is a skill in and of itself. Since Blair was so awesome, we’re taking a look at some of her best quotes.

10. On moving on

Serena: Blair Waldorf, a fling? You’re not exactly low maintenance.
Blair: It’s like Roman Holiday but I’m Gregory Peck and he’s Audrey Hepburn!
Serena: And you really expect me to believe this isn’t all about revenge on Chuck?
Blair: Revenge is so 12 hours ago! And just because Marcus is the perfect post-Bass palate cleanser doesn’t mean he isn’t a delicious dish in his own right.

Giovanni Rufino / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

9. Her sense of self-importance

Serena: Look I’m really sorry but this date is unbreakable. Maybe we can swing by later or something…
Blair: I’m not a stop along the way I’m a destination and if you refuse to attend I’m gonna have to find a replacement, girls the waiting list.

8. Her wisdom

Blair: Whoever said that money doesn’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.

7. On Ivy League schools

Serena: Brown is an Ivy league school.
Blair: Everyone knows that the only real Ivies are the holy trinity: Harvard, Yale, and Princeton.
Serena: Well I know you may find this hard to believe but not everyone wants to go to Yale because not everyone wants to be Blair Waldorf.
Blair: Not everyone can be. Since we’re not friends anymore let me speak frankly, your not that smart. You lack focus and discipline. Charm is all well and good but in the real world knowledge is power. You wouldn’t make it past the first round of admissions at Yale no matter how hard you tried. Have fun in Providence.

6. On ruling with an iron first

Blair: That’s the thing. You need to be cool to be queen. Anne Boleyn thought only with her heart and she got her head chopped off. So her daughter Elizabeth made a vow never to marry a man. She married a country. Forget boys. Keep your eye on the prize, Jenny Humphrey. You can’t make people love you, but you can make them fear you.

5. On partying crashing

Blair: Watch and learn, ladies. The most important parties to attend are the ones you’re not invited to.

Giovanni Rufino / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

4. When she’s won

Blair: My, my, if it isn’t little J risen from the ashes.
Jenny: I came to tell you in person. You win.
Blair: Oh, sweetie, we just started to play.
Jenny: No, you don’t understand. I’m done. With you, with them, with all of it.
Blair: Just like that? You wave the white flag.
Jenny: I lied, and I stole, and I lost the respect of my family, for what? So I can be like you? You asked me before if it was all worth it. And my answer is it’s not.
Blair: I tried to warn you. There’s a price to pay. I always knew a girl like you couldn’t afford it.

3. On her party guest list

Blair: This guest list, however, is a complete page one.
Dorota: But those are your friends.
Blair: Then invite strangers! I have to present myself as a crown jewel. Surrounded by other, smaller, slightly flawed gems. But quality nonetheless. And try to round up a few people who can vote so it doesn’t feel like a total high school party.

2. On destiny

Blair: Destiny is for losers. It’s just a stupid excuse to wait for things to happen instead of making them happen.

1. On what’s important in a relationship

Blair: The most important thing in a relationship is trust. After sex. And hygiene. And earning potential.